here's a personal reflection about diversion and darkness dated 26 January 2006, about two years ago. this was written in my uncle's place in pasig when i was still 22, i can't exactly remember what my situation was that time but just reading it tells me that i was going through certain difficulties in life, lacking sense of direction...a dialogue with misery. misery was my companion and she remains to be so. suffering is something i'm afraid to face but the only choice i have is to accept it:
the mind would always want to capture happy moments.
frequently, it dwells in the past. it rarely appreciates the present.
the present brings pain and sadness...things the mind couldn't freely accept...
thus the struggle...slavery from within.the mind clearly becomes a slave of the past.
every struggle brings about darkness...the feeling of being lost.
the loneliness of having no one..of having no companion.the feeling of being alone.
the absence of sight and light.
the heart wants to be free..but the struggle goes on...because of attachment.
it has become a habit.there is great difficulty in changing a certain habit...especially if it
brings 'pleasure'.the feeling of emptiness...life has become senseless.
the mind tends to want more, never really gets contented with the present.
this is perhaps the very reason why man has this so called 'diversion', a 'reality'
he has created to cover reality itself...something that could 'free' him...a form of escape.
Diversion has become an end...this makes things more difficult for man to achieve what
happiness truly is...man today, has a distorted definition of happiness.
frequently, it dwells in the past. it rarely appreciates the present.
the present brings pain and sadness...things the mind couldn't freely accept...
thus the struggle...slavery from within.the mind clearly becomes a slave of the past.
every struggle brings about darkness...the feeling of being lost.
the loneliness of having no one..of having no companion.the feeling of being alone.
the absence of sight and light.
the heart wants to be free..but the struggle goes on...because of attachment.
it has become a habit.there is great difficulty in changing a certain habit...especially if it
brings 'pleasure'.the feeling of emptiness...life has become senseless.
the mind tends to want more, never really gets contented with the present.
this is perhaps the very reason why man has this so called 'diversion', a 'reality'
he has created to cover reality itself...something that could 'free' him...a form of escape.
Diversion has become an end...this makes things more difficult for man to achieve what
happiness truly is...man today, has a distorted definition of happiness.
